The Christians in the In-Between
There’s a quiet group of believers who don’t often get talked about—the ones living in the in-between. Not fully discipled, but not fully lost. Not on fire, but not forsaking the faith. They love God, yet struggle to show up for Him consistently. They know the beauty of community, yet some Sundays they can’t get themselves out of bed. They long for heaven, yet feel the weight of earth.
These are the Christians who live between being fully anchored and feeling like they’re drifting.
And truthfully? Most of us have been there.
Seasons where God felt nearer yesterday than He does today. Seasons where the Bible sits unopened but the heart still whispers His name. Seasons where our prayers feel small, tired, or clumsy but still offered.
I was inspired to write this after meeting friends who are in the in-between. For more than 20 years, I lived outside of church. And now, looking back, I see the lies we once called freedom. If you’ve read my story, you’ll know I was raised a Christian, but one traumatic teenage decision changed the course of my life. When people in church hurt me or stopped walking alongside me, I started seeking validation and belonging in places that simply felt good.
We weren’t doing anything “bad.”
We just weren’t living fully in the truth. And over the years, we created our own truths. It became normal to keep the faith but not do the work.
But the in-between isn’t failure.
It’s not rebellion.
It’s not the end of your faith story.
It’s a tender place where your soul still reaches for God even when your strength doesn’t. It’s the space where hope survives even when habits don’t. It’s where you discover that grace is not just for the strong. it’s for the wavering, the wandering, the weary.
Lessons I’ve Learned Now That I’m Walking With God Faithfully Again
1. God is not disappointed. He’s drawing near. For years I thought distance meant failure, and failure meant God’s disappointment. But coming back showed me this: God doesn’t fold His arms; He opens them. Every step I took toward Him, He had already taken ten toward me.
2. Your distance does not disqualify you. I thought my inconsistency, my wandering, and my years outside church made me less worthy. But God doesn’t erase callings; He restores hearts. What I once thought was “lost time” became the very testimony that draws me deeper into grace.
3. Your longing is still worship. I used to think worship was only loud, passionate, consistent devotion. But God sees even the quiet ache. Even the “I want to want You again.” Even the small prayers offered with tired hands. Longing is worship because it’s the soul reaching for its Creator.
4. Your hope is a sign of His hand on your life. Hope doesn’t show up accidentally. It’s planted. It’s sustained.
It’s God whispering, “I’m not done with your story.”
Even in the in-between, even when I felt far, something in me kept believing there was more; and that “more” was God Himself gently leading me home.
The miracle of the in-between is this:
You may feel far from God, but He is never far from you.
Then Jesus told them this parable: “Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’ I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent. Luke 15:3-7
God doesn’t wait for us at the finish line.
Jesus steps into the in-between, Stood beside us, and Lovingly leads us home. Often in ways so subtle we only recognize them in hindsight. To sum up my years in the wilderness, here’s how I know He was closer than I ever realized:
1. Through a Whisper or Nudge
Sometimes it’s not a loud conviction, but a quiet thought:
“I should pray.”
“Maybe I should visit a church.”
“I kinda miss God.”
These tiny nudges don’t come from human strength. They’re grace in motion. It is God stirring your spirit even when your habits feel weak.
2. Through “Coincidental” Encounters
You think it’s a coincidence that a friend reaches out on the very day you feel discouraged?
It isn’t. These moments feel random, but heaven is orchestrating every detail.
God often speaks through people. A simple “How are you?” becomes a lifeline. A conversation becomes clarity. A catch-up becomes comfort. A familiar voice becomes a reminder: you are not forgotten.
While I lived a life of “without God”, I tried to explain these encounters away. The world calls them “the universe,” or “law of attraction,” or “manifestation, as if they were the product of my own mind.
But they weren’t.
Those “signs” weren’t the universe aligning. They were God intervening.
Looking back now, I can see that the enemy loves confusion. Anything that keeps us from recognizing the Father’s hand. He’s also subtle, and he twists our language so we credit the wrong source. But the truth is this:
It was God all along. Protecting, reminding, and redirecting my steps before I even knew I needed saving.
When heaven moves, it rarely announces itself loudly. It shows up in small moments that make sense only when your heart finally turns homeward.
3. Through Worship That Hits Different
Maybe you weren’t even trying to encounter Him, but a worship song plays in the background, and suddenly your heart softens. Tears stream or peace comes in, or memories of His goodness surface. That’s God drawing you back with tenderness, never a force.
4. Through a Sermon or Verse That Feels Personal
Sometimes you show up in church after weeks(or years) of not wanting to, and the message feels like it was written specifically for you. Or you open Instagram randomly and a verse speaks exactly into your season! That’s God guiding you with His word!. Always precise, timely, intentional.
5. Through Gentle Conviction, Not Condemnation
Conviction that says: “Come back, there’s more for you.”
Not condemnation that says: “You’ve failed, stay away.”
God leads with love, and love always pulls us toward Him, never away.
6. Through Restlessness That Points Back to Him
Sometimes the in-between becomes uncomfortable. Not because God is punishing you, but because He is awakening you. The dissatisfaction with your spiritual dryness is a sign that your heart still belongs to Him.
For me, these quiet restlessness were moments when the parties stopped feeling fun. I’d be surrounded by people, music, and noise, yet something in me felt out of place. Some nights, I’d rather be home, sitting in stillness, letting a few old Hillsong songs play in the background.
Those melodies stirred something familiar… something holy.
They reminded me of His goodness, His nearness, and who I really was beneath all the noise.
My Friend, you Are Still Being Led Home
Home is not just heaven
home is in His presence.
And even in seasons of distance, God keeps guiding you.
One whisper at a time.
One reminder at a time.
One connection at a time.
One softening of the heart at a time.
He doesn’t yell.
He doesn’t threaten.
He simply keeps showing up
through people, through moments, through truth.
Until your soul remembers the way back.
I just want you to know, you’re not wandering alone.
God still sees you.
The same God who met me in my wilderness is the God who is meeting you in yours.
Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well. Luke 12:27-31
For the Ones Who Left Church Because Christianity Felt Like Law, Not Life
There are some who didn’t leave church because they stopped believing. You left because you were tired.
Tired of the pressure and the expectations. You’re tired of trying to be “a good Christian” and feeling like they were always falling short.
Maybe you walked away because faith started to feel like a checklist instead of a relationship.
Maybe the weight of “do this, don’t do that” made you feel more burdened than free.
Maybe you thought leaving would help you breathe again.
If that’s you, read this with love:
You weren’t running from God.
You were running from the lawness you thought represented Him.
Some of us left because we only ever learned the rules, not the heart behind them.
We were taught how to behave before we were taught how to belong.
We experienced correction without compassion, boundaries without grace, responsibility without intimacy.
And the enemy used that heaviness to whisper:
“See? Christianity is too much for you.”
“God is disappointed.”
“You’ll never be enough.”
But that was never the voice of God.
Jesus didn’t come to load us with law. He came to break the law and gave us life!
The exhaustion you felt wasn’t because you failed. It was because you were carrying burdens He never asked you to carry.
If you left church because you were blinded by the pressure of perfection, or worn out by the weight of performance, please know:
You didn’t walk away from Jesus.
You walked away from a version of faith that didn’t reflect Him.
And God is not angry.
He’s not keeping score.
He’s not waiting for you to “fix yourself” first.
He simply wants you. The tired, honest, messy, unsure, and all.
If something in you misses Him…
If something in you longs for what felt real…
If something in you aches for peace, belonging, or clarity…
See Jesus, not law.
See grace, not guilt.
See rest, not requirement.
God is not calling you back to rules.
He’s calling you back to relationship.
And if you feel even the smallest pull,
the softest stirring… come back to home.
